The Monroe Legacy - G.3. Chapter 12 - Heart of Darkness

This chapter is rated PG-13 as it refers to subjects that some readers may find upsetting.

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The first year was everything they had hoped it would be. Lillia was a placid baby, sleeping through almost from the start, as if to make up for the turbulent pregnancy. She cut her first tooth with barely a complaint and could bring a smile to her daddy's face even on his gloomiest days.

Rachel worshiped her baby daughter,  amazed and surprised by every little noise she made, every new thing she did. It did Gray good to see how happy their new arrival had made his wife, the days when he couldn't shake visions of Eva at the same age he would focus instead on the joy radiating for. The woman he loved and remind himself that Lillia was the product of what he felt for her, and in no way a replacement for Eva.

Every surprise Lillia had brought Rachel paled into comparison when she found herself pregnant again before their daughters first birthday. It was not planned or even discussed but once the pair got over the shock they could see the appeal of having two children close in age.

Shortly after their little girl's birthday party Gray and Rachel found out they would be giving her a little brother. Gray was secretly relieved, he wasn't sure he could have coped with another little blonde girl running about, Lillia looked more like her big sister every day.

This time around Rachel didn't suffer more than the normal sickness, glowing with happiness as she played with her little girl and imagined her son playing with them. Rachel had decided to quit the restaurant for the time being, content to spend every waking moment enjoying her family and Gray was pleased to support her in this. Working gave him structure and he lived to come home to a busy, smiling household and hear about all the day's little dramas.

It was one of these evenings when his phone went, an unknown number that he assumed was a supplier calling about a delivery. Flopping on the sofa and grinning at Rachel balancing a giggling Lillia on her rapidly expanding bump, he froze as he heard the automated voice tell him this was a call from the Acapulco police department.

His heart skipped a beat. Could this be it.

Rachel hadn't noticed Gray stiffen but she noticed when his face turned white. She waited, shushing Lillia and praying that whatever happened next wouldn't destroy the happiness they had salvaged from the wreckage of heir old lives.   

Gray hung up, his hands shaking, his voice shaking.

'They found Aisha' he managed, his voice a monotone and his eyes staring at nothing. 'She's in their morgue. They think a gang related shooting'

Rachel clutched Lillia closer! covering her ears though she was much too young to understand. She waited for Gray to continue, the next words forced and desperate.

'They also have the body of a young girl believed to be her daughter. Aged about 10. No ID.'

His voice barely raised above a whisper he choked out five more words before he broke down.

'I have to identify them.'

As Gray fell apart Rachel leaped into action. Whilst she wanted nothing more than to curl up with her husband and let him cry but she knew once he had got past this initial shock he wouldn't want to wait. Calling Saffron to take Lillia for the night she got onto the phone with a travel company, booking a seat on the first flight of the next day. She wished she could go with him, to be there when what they had feared but never said aloud was confirmed, but she was too far along to fly without the doctors permission, permission that she couldn't organise in time.

Once everything was settled she sat by Gray, holding him when he would let her and staying silent to avoid those meaningless words if comfort that she couldn't be sure were true.

It wouldn't all be okay and she couldn't promise it would get easier.

They drive to the airport in silence, his fierce hug at the gate the only sign Rachel had seen of Gray's fighting spirit since the phone call. She worried that the man who returned from Mexico might be changed beyond recognition.

Gray boarded the plane in a daze, stared at the wall through takeoff before finally turning his gaze to the brown of the desert as he passed it by.

He was dreading landing, dreading the taxi drive to the police station. Dreading seeing Aisha again, even like this. He'd always imagined he would at least get to look her in the eye and tell her what she had done to him, to see if there was remorse in her eyes. Would she be sorry? Now he would never know.

And then Eva.

He couldn't think of it. He wouldn't make it if he thought of it. But one thought circled his brain insistently, like a vulture around the broken mess of his heart.

He had imagined how she would look at this age, and now he would find out. But she wouldn't grow any more. Not in life or in his head. This was all she would ever get to be.

He mustn't think of it.

The numbness lasted him to the police station and through the paperwork. It stayed when they drew back the sheet on the bigger gurney. It was Aisha. Older and colder but unmistakable, the numbness even made him immune to the horrid grimace on her lifeless face.

As the attendant reached for the sheet that covered a smaller form Gray turned away. The numbness was fading and he could feel something, a scream or possibly vomit rising in his throat. A dull reflection showed the sheet rise and be folded back.

'Mr Monroe, is this your daughter?'

The voice sounded as if it were miles away. It was now or never.

Gray turned around.

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Chapter 13 - Degrees of Separation